


(I Don’t) Need Your Love

by artificialmac



Series: Brooke Lynn Hytes and Other Residential Neighborhoods in New York [23]
Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Angst, Brooke-centric, Drabble, Drabble Collection, F/M, M/M, Post-Break Up, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-12
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:35:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21762325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artificialmac/pseuds/artificialmac
Summary: Vanessa is a romantic. Brooke is only human. They do their best.... until their best is not enough.
Relationships: Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo
Series: Brooke Lynn Hytes and Other Residential Neighborhoods in New York [23]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1382581
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	(I Don’t) Need Your Love

**Author's Note:**

> Some more angsty Branjie for your nerves. I’m hyperfixating on Six: The Musical so that’s what’s up with the title. Thanks. Love ya.

“I’m bad at being alone,” He said

“I’m not going to leave you alone.” She said.

“You can’t mean that.”

“You can’t know I don’t.”

And that’s how it usually starts.  
With a pseudo-promise and an emptiness.  
Usually in one chest.

In this case, it was both. 

So she said she wouldn’t leave him and she didn’t. She stuck by her promise. Through the drama and the jealousy and the never being enough. She stayed.  
And she very nearly killed herself in the process.

He was… wild  
Untamed at times  
Angry, a lot of times. 

But he was also lovely   
And kind  
And generous  
And forgiving of her shortcomings

But that was only sometimes.

He would lash out at her.   
He would make jokes tinged with his “badness at being alone,” and if she didn’t react right, he’d be mad.  
He wanted her to be something she wasn’t.

He wanted her to be perfect.

and wasn’t that just a kick in the head?

Perfection 

The thing she never could achieve. The thing she had worked her whole life to be. The thing she could never quite reach

He didn’t love her for the same reasons she didn’t love herself.

Love, Brooke decided, was not supposed to be like this.  
It was not supposed to be this hard.

And it wasn’t.

But people saw that as her breaking her promise. People saw it as her not trying hard enough. 

The heartbreaker always gets the blame for the heartless’ flaws.

And in some cases, that’s okay.

In others, it leads to a loss.  
A crown and a check and a lover who never understood.

And so maybe she was bitter that he got all the condolences.  
Maybe she was angry that no one could see behind the innocent character he so liked to hide behind.   
Maybe she was pissed.

She had every right to be.

He had every right to be.

They both had every right to be pissed and sad. So said everyone.

But everyone didn’t tell them how long they were allowed to be pissed and sad. 

So Brooke didn’t stop.

She was pissed when she saw his perfect smiling face on her timeline.  
She was sad when she saw clips from the solo shows he did.

She was pissed when he FaceTimed her during a show.  
She was sad when he FaceTimed her after the show.

So it was this mess, right?  
This mess of being angry and sad and not enough.  
And Brooke hated it more than she hated herself.

So when they met again after everything, it went about as well as you’d expect. And when they fell in and out of bed together from city to city, it felt a lot like their first conversation. 

Except this time, the emptiness had migrated.

“I’m bad at this whole thing,” She said as he pulled on the remainder of his clothes, readying himself to sneak back to his bunk.

Jose gave a joyless laugh. “You’re not bad at anything.” 

“I was bad at being with you.”

There was a pause.

“You’re not bad at anything.” He repeated.


End file.
